Howl At The Moon
by ali0831
Summary: When she has a terrible nightmare about Jacob she returns to La Push on her own. & the sudden flame is rekindled. But will Bellas love for edward tear them apart? or can Jacob really be the one for her? JacobXbella
1. Return

**A/N: So I haven't done any fanfiction in quite some time and this chapters probably a bit rusty but go easy. I hope you enjoy it. depending on how many reviews i get, chapter two may be up shortly.**

My first few months at Dartmouth were sort of a drag. Sure I was happy, I spent ninety-five percent of my days with Edward and I'd never wanted it to change.

But something had been seriously bugging me.

I was homesick.

I missed Charlie and Renee and most importantly-Jacob Black.

My best friend and my other love. My pleasure and my pain.

He was in each and every thought I had. I always thought that all I needed to be happy was Edward but I was wrong.

I never realized or even thought of how much I would miss Jacob when I moved, and when I was no longer human.

I couldn't even bare to stand the thought of what my immortality would do to Jacob…

I knew it would hurt, but the problem was that I didn't have the strength to let him go, I couldn't say goodbye.

I thought about the promise Carlisle had made me.

He asked me if I was ready and I had said "no" emotionless.

This made Edward happy and if he could read my thoughts. He'd understand that it wasn't only for him. But to keep Jacob in my life, if not forever than a little bit longer…that was all I needed.

I was torn in half. Between my love for the beautiful, unselfish, understanding Edward Cullen, and my love for Jacob Black; my savor, my protector.

* * *

"Stop it!" I screamed. "You're hurting him!!!" I looked around helplessly;

I didn't even know who it was that the vampire was beating to a bloody pulp.

My heart ached in my chest as I heard a light whimper escape from the creature lying mangled on the ground.

"No…" I whispered. I didn't have the slightest hint of fear in me.

I didn't care that a vampire stood no more than four feet away. I didn't care that he could attack me in any second.

_Not my Jacob_. I thought.

The vampire hissed enthusiasm resting over his face.

He picked up the mutilated wolfs head gently. I cried out in horror as I heard the sickening snap of his neck.

"My Jacob…" I mumbled falling to my knees in defeat. I clutched my chest hoping to stop the ripping at my heart.

My Jacob Black was----dead.

* * *

I woke up in a cold sweat screaming at the top of my lungs.

"No, no, no, no" I said between choking sobs. I felt cold fingers graze my cheek.

I threw my arms around him sobbing into his chest. "What happened?" He asked, worried.

"I saw….I saw it…it was so…real…Oh Edward…he broke his..." My words came out as mush.

I couldn't bear to speak the words. It was bad enough that the tragic dream was still replaying in my head time and time again.

I swallowed trying to remove the gigantic lump in my throat. It hurt considering how dry my mouth was.

Edward kissed me softly. "It was only a dream."

I shook my head mechanically. "No, it wasn't…" I whispered.

"It was Jacob." I muttered.

Edwards face stayed smooth. He never really reacted when I mentioned Jacob anymore.

I got up and grabbed my suitcase.

"What are you doing?" He asked surprise in his voice.

I smiled wryly. "I need to go make sure he's okay." I answered in a little more than a whisper.

"Okay. We'll leave tomorrow." He said, his soft velvet voice soothing me. I sighed heavily.

How was I supposed to say this? I'm sorry Edward but I'm going to go see my boyfriend without my fiancé? Ouch. When I put it like that it sounded terrible. Not to mention trashy.

"I…Edward…" I began. I closed my eyes exhaling. "I'm going to be staying in La Push so I'm going-alone." I told him firmly.

I noticed his right hand clench into a fist. "No." He objected. I walked over to him sitting on his lap;

I unclenched his fist and intertwined our fingers. "He needs me…" I said in a pleading voice.

"The Quiletes will be there, with me. You know they'll protect me." Edward was silent for almost 3 minutes.

"Breathe." I reminded him. Sometimes he forgot to when he was aggravated.

He smiled my favorite crooked smile but I saw the hurt in his eyes.

I looked away, I couldn't look at him when his pain shown through his eyes.

"I do trust the wolves. So…you can go. I won't interfere." He said the last part through clenched teeth.

"Thank you." I whispered kissing him deeply.

He grabbed me around my waist pulling me closer to him.

I broke the kiss quickly alarmed.

That was how Jacob had kissed me….and I didn't want to be reminded of it…..not by Edward…

He crinkled his brow. "I'm sorry." I smiled kissing him again sweetly.

I got up once again and went to my closet tossing anything and everything I had in the suitcase.

Edward stood behind me hands wrapped around my waist.

Firmly, but not enough to make me wonder…

I gasped as I felt the sudden trembling in his arms…his hands.

He did not want me to leave.

"I swear if you have one more thought of that vampire lover. I'm going to shoot you." Leah spat harshly.

Jacob ignored her. "Sorry…" He murmured.

All of Leah's cruel opinions didn't matter, nothing mattered-anymore.

Not since he'd lost his Bella. She was gone for good, a vampire now.

_"There's no room for me in her heart…"_ He thought.

Leah snorted obnoxiously. "Jake…get a grip." She rolled her eyes.

"Shut the hell up Leah!" He shouted clenching his fists.

She folded her arms across her chest, raising an eyebrow. "You gonna hit me?" She asked amused.

Jacob stormed off in the other direction. "I'm going home." He said.

I sighed as I tossed my suitcase in the back seat. I now drove a black Ford fusion, mint-condition.

I did miss my old truck though. I had so many memories…I got in putting the keys in the ignition.

What the hell was I doing? I thought.

"I have to…just to see if he's alright." It wasn't that long of a drive back to forks, 3, 4 hours tops.

Edward stood outside my door. He ducked his head in my window giving me a million kisses.

"I'll miss you." He said smiling sadly.

"I'll miss you more. I'll be back…soon." What had gotten into me?

For the longest time I couldn't stand going an hour without being with Edward now I was leaving him for a completely different state?

When did things begin to change so much? When did my feelings begin to change so much?

I loved Edward more than life itself, it was true. But it wasn't quite the feeling of need anymore…it was…

I shook my head trying to clear my thoughts.

Stress over my soon to be husband was not what I wanted to think about right now.

I started the engine and drove off, heading back to the little town of La Push, Washington, back to my lonely wolf.

_"Get your ass up. No more moping. We need to go to Seattle. Now." _Sam's voice was stern in Jacobs head.

He turned over on his stomach digging his face in his pillow. _"Leave me alone…" _He responded

_ "Look man, we're sorry about Bells. But it's over with. Maybe you should focus on finding your imprint."_ Embry's voice was in his head now.

Focus on his imprint? Yeah right, what if his human side already interfered with that?

As far as Jake was concerned, his imprint did not exist

_"Please, Jake?"_ Seth asked, begging.

Jacob rolled his eyes. He got up off the bed _"Where should I meet you guys?"_

_"The Forest."_ Sam said.

The streets were darker than usual in Seattle the four wolves walked cautiously through the streets.

"What happened?" Jake asked not filled in on the whole story.

"Leah was…attacked." Sam said closing his eyes.

It was so painful for him to think of her, let alone look at her.

He made Leah so many promises, they had so many dreams, and then, he broke her heart

_"What if…I do that to Bella?…what if I do find an imprint…but why do my instincts tell me that it's Bella?"_ Sam turned his gaze to Jacob as they walked.

_"You're in love with her Jake; the irrational part of your mind won't accept anything. She's…She's not coming back."_

Sam tried to tell him in the nicest way possible but it still made his blood boil.

That was a blow to the chest. It felt as if someone was taking a knife and tearing his heart to shreds.

"Where are these stupid mutts?!" Jake shouted.

He growled under his breath before transforming. The others did the same.

Jake howled at the moon. A sad, heart wrenching howl. All the pain and agony he felt was heard when he howled.

The pain he felt was unbearable.

Bella slammed on her breaks as her heart broke. She heard a faint howl, she knew the howl, and it was the same agonizing howl she heard when she and Edward were at the campsite.

She held her breath as she stepped on the gas. "Jake…" she muttered.

The pack stopped in front of the alley.

They saw the eyes of there enemies, seven wolves stared back at them in the darkness.

Jacob growled, ready to pounce.

Jacob walked to the head of the pack snapping his teeth and growling.

The Alpha male of the other pack stepped forward. He pounced on Jacob tearing gigantic pieces of fur and skin from his body.

_"NO! JAKE!"_ Embry said through his thoughts.

_"Don't….go…"_ Jake told them.

Jacob twisted his body so that his razor sharp teeth were near at least a part of the Alpha.

Jacob took a quick chunk out of the alphas leg.

The Alpha growled deeply. He took his gigantic paw, crushing Jacobs' chest and took a bite out of Jakes neck.

He was quick and swift about it.

Jacob whimpered as his vision blurred.

The last thing he saw was another wolf smashing into the Alpha.

_"Take him home."_ Sam ordered, Embry was one of the biggest and it was trouble getting Jacob on him when he was in his werewolf form.

The pack helped nudge Jacob onto Embry's back.

_"Hurry."_ Sam said. And with that, Embry disappeared.

My heart accelerated as I entered the tiny town of La Push.

I wondered what time it was. "6:30…" I said instinctively looking at my stereo clock.

"I'm not too early or late…they should all be at home or hanging out, La Push isn't big…I'll find them no problem." It began to rain as I sped down the wet slick roads.

I'd forgotten the rain situation in this part of Washington.

I swallowed. Exhaling slowly.

There it was Jacobs little house…his garage…him.

I closed my eyes as my heart tightened in my chest, as if it were about to explode.

What if he found someone else? What if?.…I shook my head.

"It doesn't matter." I lied to myself. So it was true, I really was a bad liar.

I pulled up in the Blacks' driveway slamming my car door and running through the rain.

I rang the door bell once…twice…nothing. For some odd reason I began to worry, fear crept into me.

I banged on the door loudly.

After waiting for at least 5 minutes standing in the pouring rain getting completely soaked, I gave up.

"Sam's…" I told myself, running back to my car.

I jumped out of the car the second I pulled into the driveway.

I was desperately in need-I needed to know Jacob was okay, that he was alive. I needed to touch him…hug him…feels his strong hands around my waist.

I rang the door bell and was relieved when Emily answered the door almost immediately.

"Hi, Bella." She greeted me, surprised.

She laughed happily, "It's like seeing a ghost!" She said cheerfully.

I smiled as she opened her arms to hug me. I accepted the offer.

"Come in." She said. I walked in and sat down impatiently.

"Sam!" Emily shouted up the stairs.

He came running down and I noticed his reaction to seeing me. His jaw dropped in surprise.

"I never thought I'd see you again." He straightened up his expression trying to seem casual.

I didn't respond.

"Where's Jacob?" I asked the impatience seeping through my voice.

Sam cringed at my question. I knew that look. I knew it.

The tears welled up in my eyes uncontrollably.

"No Bells, no…he's…not…" Sam said coming to my aid and running a comforting hand up and down my back.

"Why are you here?" He asked curiously.

"I needed to see him…" I whispered.

Sam took a step back. He closed his eyes. He's at home…but…it's not pretty Bella." He told me, sadness drifting in those beautiful pools of blue.

"I need to see him." I said. I didn't care how terrible he looked; I didn't care if I couldn't handle it.

I needed to touch him…to hear his voice and see his smile.

"Where's Edward?" Emily asked curiosity and amazement in her voice.

I swallowed which seemed harder than usually. "I left…him." I said.

The words came out all wrong I hadn't left him…I just left him for a while, just to see if Jacob was okay.

"You did, did you?" Sam asked seeming a little pleased.

"Not exactly left him, but he won't be joining me." Sam nodded a grin still imprinted on his face.

"Hang on…I'm going to get Jake." Sam said.

He reached into Jacobs mind _"Jake wake up."_ I stared at him casually.

I knew what he was doing. Sam huffed. "He's impossible to wake." I giggled. "Tell me about it." I agreed under my breath.

"There he is." Sam said smiling.

_"mmm…what?"_

_"How you feeling?" _Sam laughed looking at me, He's grouchy.

I shrugged still smiling. God, how I missed this. I missed the pack…and I missed my wolf.

"Go over there and surprise him." Sam said grinning from ear to ear.

"Doesn't he already know I'm here? I mean you guys can read each others thoughts."

Sam shook his head in disagreement. "We have the power to tap into each others mind while in our human form the only time we can see each others thoughts full time is when we're in our wolf form."

I stood up and took a deep breath.

Why was I so nervous? This was _Jacob._

Emily and Sam about pushed me out of the house before I could even say bye.

"How long are you going to stay for Bells?" Sam asked.

I smiled happily.

"A while." I said as I got into my car and drove off to Jakes.

This time, I didn't bother knocking.

Obviously Billy was out fishing with my dad or he was over at Sues.

I opened the door quietly trying not to make to much noise.

I found my way up the stairs and peaked into Jakes room.

I gasped horrified at his condition. He had cuts and bruises all over him and some pieces of skin were missing… in certain spots, as if they were bitten off.

"Oh my god…" I whispered. Silent tears poured from my eyes.

I opened it just enough to squeeze my body through.

Jacob stirred in his sleep.

From the time I was gone, he got a much larger bed.

King sized. It took up most of his room.

Well, all of it actually, but he was a werewolf.

He didn't need anything but a bed. All his fun was outside of this house.

I couldn't stop the tears from coming as I looked down at his face.

Pain shown in every line…it was written all over his gorgeous face.

I noticed the gaping wound in his neck. I

thought I was going to be sick the second I saw muscle tissue and a little bone. But I was wrong.

At this moment, nothing bothered me. Not the smell of the blood or the mess of Jacob.

I wiped my tears and crawled into bed quietly my body facing his.

I looked at his facial features.

He was so extraordinary, beautiful in so many ways.

I grazed his cheek with the back of my hand…gently fondling him. "Wake up…Jake..." I whispered softly.

Our lips were no more than a breath apart.

"It's me." I breathed.

His eyes fluttered open at the sound of my voice. "Bella?" He questioned.

"I must be dreaming." He told himself sitting up.

He gritted his teeth in pain. Why wasn't he healing?

"Jake..." I said once again. Sitting up as well,

"No, you're only a dream." I smiled sadly; Did he really think I forgot about him that easily?

"Touch me. Hug me." I told him.

He shook his head.

"No, I don't want this dream to destroy me. It can't be real." He tried to convince himself.

I moved in closer to him. His face inches from mine.

"It's me." I said once again.

I placed my palm against his cheek stroking his jaw line with my thumb.

Shock struck his eyes as he placed his warm hand over mine.

"Bella." He whispered. I smiled nodding.

He removed his hand from mine and quickly in a rough yet gently manner grabbed me by my waist pulling him into his chest.

His hands tightened around my waist.

Not tight enough to hurt me. He embraced me.

I smiled through my tears.

"What are you doing here?" He asked.

"I needed to see you." I confessed.

He pulled me away, hands still on my waist smiling his obnoxious grin.

"Don't start." He shook his head. "I wasn't gonna say a word." He said.

I sighed. "I knew you'd miss me." He said finally.

I rolled my eyes, knowing it was coming. "Lay down your injured. You shouldn't talk when you're hurt." I said irritated.

He looked at me, his face more serious than I have ever seen it in my life.

The way he looked at me made my entire body shiver;

he looked at me with so much love in his eyes that I forgot how to breathe.

It was an intense, fiery look.

I'd never seen anything like it and it pleased me but at the same time made me tremble. "I missed you, too." He whispered.

**A/N: Okay, so im no Stephanie Meyer but I guess i'm okay. and NO i dont hate Edward at all. I know it may seem like it in this story but that's misleading lol. I love Edward but its time for Jacob to shine. Edward gets all the lovin in the actual series lol you gotta kinda look at Jacob and say "poor guy, he just cant win" lol so i decided to write a fanfic about him n Bella.**


	2. Selfish

**A/N: yay! chapter two! I must say that I LOVE this chapter...hehehe. Well, i got a couple comments on the first chapter whcih i was grateful for. Sorry about all the spelling errors, I read over the chapter like 3 times but my eyes miss a lot of stuff lol. i have more grammar errorss than anything. Remind me to work on that...lol. Well...Chapter 2!**

_Disclaimer: I totally don't own the twilight series and none of the characters. That's all Stephanie Meyer right there._

My eyes opened slowly. When did I fall asleep? I wondered.

I felt Jacob's arms wrapped securely around my waist.

I turn over to look at him.

"Hi." He grinned.

I never noticed it before, but I adored the way he looked at me.

As If I was the most gorgeous, perfect girl he'd ever laid his eyes on.

I could never look him in the eyes for long.

"How long have I been sleeping for?" I asked, shifting my body in his arms, his fingers traced little circles over and over again on the small of my back.

I rested my head on his chest.

"Why are you here?" He finally asked me.

I sighed, biting my lip.

"Answer my question first." I mumbled.

Jacob sighed; I looked up at his face and humor danced in his eyes.

"Well, you were snoring like a soldier, that's for sure." My jaw dropped in defense. I playfully slapped his forearm.

He chuckled lightly. "About four hours." He looked down at me smiling sweetly.

"Now what are you doing here?" He looked at me for an answer.

What was I supposed to say?

_Hey Jacob, I've been having these odd dreams where I saw you getting murdered._

I sighed, as stupid as it sounded in my head that was exactly what I needed to say.

"Damn." Jacob said through clenched teeth.

"What is it?" I looked at him worried.

"The pack needs me. Some trouble down in Seattle again." He sighed getting up.

I grabbed his arm. "No, you're in no condition to do anything! Tell Sam I said no." Jake closed his eyes throwing his head back.

"Please Jake? Not yet, you're not ready." Why was I talking to him in this way? As if I had any right?

He was my friend…just a…friend. Breath caught in my throat as I repeated that in my mind.

My insides twisted together in pain and I clutched my chest. Jacob furrowed his brow.

_Oh no._ He thought.

"Damn it Bella! What did he do this time? Is that why you're back?! Did he leave you again? I swear to god! When I get my hands on that bloodsucker I'll-"He stopped, clenching his fists trying to control his temper.

I stood up grabbing both of his hands. "Stop it, nothing happened between us."

I noticed the blood he'd drawn from digging his nails into his palms.

"Then why are you here?" He asked through clenched teeth.

"I…it's a long story." I didn't look up at him, I couldn't.

I hated when Jacob got like this his anger getting the best of him.

"I have to go." He told me after a few minutes of silence.

I stood up and ran to the doorway keeping him from leaving.

I felt so small, so vulnerable standing before him. He chuckled, seeming a little irritated.

"You know, I can easily pick you up and move you." I glared at him, "And you know how pissed off I would be if you did."

He gritted his teeth, looking away from me.

"I'm leaving, regardless. I'm just as stubborn as you Bells, and I'm going. They need me." I felt the tears coming, not because I was sad but because I was angry.

"But you're injuries..." He sighed, picking me up and moving me out of his way.

"I'm a big boy." He told me in a cocky voice.

I grabbed his arm as he walked away from me.

He turned around and saw the torn up look on my face.

"You better make it back in one piece." I reminded him.

There it was again, that look…the look he saved just for me.

He grabbed me by the waist pulling me as close as he could.

It wasn't one of his world famous crushing bear hugs.

It was an embrace.

He squeezed me tight, but gently. "I promise." He whispered in my ear his sweet breath sending shivers down my spine.

He kissed me on my forehead and was gone.

I laid down on the bed, trying to hold back my tears.

Edward surprisingly hadn't crossed my mind until now.

I wasn't sure if it was because I missed him or because I was so used to having someone hold me while I cried.

What if something happened to Jake while he was gone?

What if my nightmare came true?

What if….I lost him?

How would I survive if I lost him?

I huffed, irritated wiping the tears away with my sleeve.

I got up out of bed grabbing the car keys from my pocket.

I only wanted to go to one place.

The wolves ran at the same pace searching the woods just outside of Seattle.

_"Why is she back?"_ Leah asked bitterly.

_"Yeah, I was surprised…"_ Sam responded to the thought.

One thing that sucked about being a werewolf, everyone had to know your business.

_"I don't know…we weren't able to get to that part."_ Jake sighed.

"_Did the bloodsucker leave her again?" _Jacobs' heart bruised at that question.

It was selfish, but he actually was hoping that he had.

Then the stupid competition would be over. Jacob sniffed the ground curiously, hoping he'd caught a sent.

What competition? Edward Cullen had already won.

Jacob envied him so much. He had Bella, and her love.

He was going to spend forever with the one girl Jacob treasured while Jacob grew older, slowly…but he would still die eventually.

While Edward and Bella, would be together forever

. Jacob growled under his breath.

He wanted her forever he wanted her for longer than forever.

At that moment, Jacob wanted nothing more than to be a vampire.

That way, he could at least spend forever with Bella, even if they were only friends.

The pack growled at him in unison.

_"Don't you ever think that thought again. Nothing is worth wishing that. Not even some girl."_ Sam said, angry.

_"She's not just some girl."_

_ "She is!!"_ Sam shouted in his mind

_ "She's not yours Jacob, she NEVER will be. You'll find the one you're supposed to be with just like she has!"_

The entire pack stopped dead in their tracks.

Jacobs' hair stood on end, a few agonizing tears escaping from the wolf's black eyes and losing themselves in his beautiful fur.

Jacob was in constant pain.

He growled furiously.

Running full force toward Sam. Carelessly crashing into him.

The two wolves fought.

Jacob didn't care; at this point he loved the feel of self-inflicted pain.

Or physical pain itself. He loved it because it gave him a rush, it made his heart quicken and his anger escape.

Sam growled again snapping. _"Stop!"_ He said.

Jacob panted, anger coursing through his body, his heart pounding in his chest.

He looked at each one of his friends before running.

_"Where are you going?"_ Embry asked

_"Back to Bella."_ Jacob told them.

I sat in the sand staring out at the water. I loved First Beach.

I played with the sand letting it slip from my fingers. I sighed. "I wish he'd hurry." I mumbled under my breath.

It was getting late, the sun was almost down but even when it was dark I couldn't go back to Jacobs.

I wasn't ready to talk to him about everything.

I sighed once again closing my eyes. "Figured you'd be here." I jumped at the sound of his voice.

He chuckled, walking up from behind me. "Sorry." He muttered.

I looked him over and he was bleeding from almost everywhere.

His lip was busted open, dried up blood matted on it he had scratches and bite marks all over his all to perfect chest.

I gasped running a hand down the center of his chest.

"What happened to you?" I asked holding my breath.

"Sam and I got into it."

"About?" I asked folding my arms across my chest.

"You." He said resting his eyes on my face.

I gasped. What about me? Why? I stared at him silently; He knew I was waiting for an explanation.

He rested his eyes on the water once more.

"Stay with me Bella." He whispered sadly.

"I can't." I replied.

He got up walking away from me.

"Wait! Jacob! I thought you were okay with this?" Jacob glared at me and even though he looked at me with so much anger and pain in his eyes, inside of him, I saw how much love he had for me.

"I was never okay with it. What other choice do I have than to deal with it?!" He asked.

"What is it that you want Bella?" He asked me looking down at me patiently.

"You…" I whimpered.

"And Edward." He said.

I nodded foolishly.

"Bells, you can't have us both…do you understand that?" I was so sick of crying but I couldn't help it.

"I do. But tell me…tell me how I'm supposed to live my life without you!" I screamed through my tears.

"Everyday I think of you, you haunt me in my dreams you have this special place in my heart…Every time I think about you finding the person you're destined to be with. It tears me apart because I want you. I don't want someone else to have you. You've been mine this whole time and I couldn't stand watching you look at someone the same way you look at me. It would destroy me if I saw you look at someone…the way you look at me…the way you adore me…the way you look at me like I'm this perfect, flawless angel. With so much love and passion…"

Jacob gritted his teeth. Looking down at me trying to hide the pain he felt for me.

The sympathy I didn't need.

"You're so selfish…" He whispered.

It felt like someone had knocked the air right out of me.

My lungs wouldn't respond.

Those words cut me deeper than any knife would have.

Because it was true, I was the real monster, vampires and werewolves were angels compared to me.

"How do you think I feel? Knowing that Edwards the one who got everything I've ever wanted? We were made for each other Bella, I feel it and you feel it, too. You only deny it because it scares the hell out of you. You don't understand…how much I do love you…and he gets to spend forever with you…while I live my life in black and white. Forever Bella…Forever's a long time…"

The tears came then, quicker than I thought.

My heart ached at his words. I felt it….at that moment…I felt the longing in my heart for Jacob.

But I felt the love in it for Edward as well.

Jacob was my safe harbor, Edward Cullen and Jacob Black both shared pieces of my heart.

Jacob pulled me to him holding me in his arms.

"I will not make you promises I cannot keep." He whispered.

"I'll wait for you, until my heart stops beating….until the day that I die…I'll love you." He smiled, pain washing over his face.

My heart shattered in my chest. "I'm not going to make you pick and choose. My love is not enough. I understand that. I know who you want to be with and I'd do anything for you Bells…I'm not going to be selfish with you any longer. You aren't mine…you never will be." His words completely destroyed my heart.

My pathetic little heart, the same heart that loved both Edward, and Jacob.

The heart that betrayed me by making me a prey for the cruelty of love.

I wanted to tell him I was his, he deserved me just as much as Edward did and my mind was finally starting to realize this.

My heart was finally giving in.

My heart finally wanting Jacob Black more than I ever thought it could have.

He pulled me closer to him. "I love you." He whispered in my ear, letting me go.

He began walking away from me but I grabbed his wrist before he had the chance

. He turned around looking at me, confused.

I walked toward him instantly crushing my lips against his.

My arms rested at the base of his neck as I roughly clung to him.. My fingers in his hair.

His lips responded almost instantly.

His tongue glided across my bottom lip, making me weak in the knees.

He pushed me up against his body.

Explored every inch of my mouth.

His palms grabbed at my waist roughly.

At that moment, I realized just how much I needed him. Just how much we needed each other.

He broke the kiss, our noses touching.

"We were meant for each other. I wish you could see that." He whispered painfully, kissing me again.

**A/N: Not to bad ay, im super tired so probably a lot of errors im sorrrrry hope you liked it No flames please.**


	3. Need

**A/N: I sat here for a while contemplating on if i even wanted to add this chapter. It's not that important in the story i guess you could say...just some Jacob Bella time together...their is a key point to this chapter, it does lead somewhere...but i might've been able to do without...or do better. I personally enjoy this chapter. hope you enjoy toooooo! keep the reviews coming! I'd like to know if i should keep on writing.**

_Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, New Moon, or Eclipse. Nor do i own the characters. Just the ideas in this story._

Jacob pulled himself away from me, heading home.

"You coming?" He asked slowing down for me.

I looked at him puzzled. "You still want me to stay here, with you?"

He looked at me, and at that moment he looked like the young Jacob Black I adored.

His smile was adorable. "Of course I do." He said.

My heart leapt. He still wanted me, after everything I put him through.

"Come on, it's getting late." He said ahead of me, his voice sounding a thousand miles away.

I ran to catch up.

"That's right kid, you've got a bed time, school tomorrow." I said jokingly.

He chuckled. "Kid? Far from it. and its Vaction time for us. it IS June." He reminded me.

"I'm bigger than you." He said with sarcastic pride.

I laughed running ahead of him.

"Only physically." I told him.

I slowed to a walk trying to catch my breath.

We walked into the house quietly. I didn't realize how late it was, Billy was already asleep.

"Does your dad know I'm staying for a while?" I whispered.

Jacob walked into the living room turning on the lamp.

"Yup, he knows. How long are you staying for anyway?" Jacob asked picking up the remote and turning on the T.V.

"I figured I'd take a couple semesters off….maybe the rest of the year." I told him biting my lip.

Jacob smiled sheepishly. "I might have you for a whole year? Wow….wait…"

Shit. He caught on to it.

How was I supposed to talk my way out of this one?

Considering ever since my rational state of mind helped my heart make sense of my love for Jacob, I didn't know what I was going to do….not anymore.

"You'd be…human…that much longer?" I shrugged.

I saw in his eyes how hard it was for him to talk about it, and that killed me.

"But four months ago you were so thrilled and that was the only thing that you wanted. Nothing else…no one else…" I clutched my chest at his words.

He examined me.

"Bells, why do you do that?"

I looked at the T.V, not wanting to meet his eyes. "I do it when I'm in pain…when my heart feels like its being tortured and picked at. When the pain becomes…intolerable, unbearable."

Jacob walked over to me, wrapping his arms around me.

"When the pain becomes unbearable…you come to me…tell me what's wrong…" I shook my head.

I didn't feel like crying again.

"Please?" I looked up into his dark eyes and for a minute he looked just like a wounded puppy.

I quickly looked away, I refused to give in.

"Can we watch a movie?" I asked quickly changing the subject.

I was relieved when he went to grab a couple DVDs, glad he took the hint.

He put in some cheap horror movie and sat down on the couch.

He took up most of it, but there was enough room for me.

Enough room for me to lie actually.

I grabbed a pillow putting it on his lap and laying my head down. "Play with my hair…Please?" I muttered.

I hadn't realized how tired I was.

From the parts of the movie that I saw,

it involved a bunch of flesh eating zombie children who were buried in some mine back in the late 1600's or something.

"My Bella…" Jacob said looking down at my face.

I tucked my head into his warm chest.

"My Jacob." I mumbled half asleep.

"I can't believe you're falling asleep on me this is the best part." He whined.

"Okay, okay. I'm awake." I muttered opening my eyes half way to stare at the TV.

I gave him thumbs up and tucked my head back into his chest.

I heard Jacob grab the remote and shut off the TV. Then he picked me up carrying me to his bedroom.

"Where are you sleeping?" I asked him still half asleep.

"The couch." He said grimly. I opened my eyes, seeming fully awake now. "No…I want you with me. I don't want to be alone."

Jacob sighed. "Billy will have a heart attack."

I didn't care; I was so used to having Edward with me at night it felt strange to sleep alone.

"The things I do for you…" Jacob muttered smiling lightly.

He placed me on the bed gently and crawled up next to me wrapping his arms around me from behind.

He lifted my shirt a little exposing my stomach, Jacob needed to be in contact with my skin.

I didn't know if it was because he was afraid it would suddenly start to freeze over, or if he just loved the feel of it.

I didn't care what his reasons were, because that was one thing I loved that he did.

I loved the feel of his hands on my skin wanting me so much more than he let on.

"Bella, what am I to you?" He whispered in my ear.

"You're my pleasure…and my pain…my protector…and savor…and my love." I said sleepily.

"Does that make me...your-" Jacob stopped himself, he believed in the saying some things are better left unsaid but I didn't, and if I wasn't so tired I would have got the rest out of him.

I found his hand resting on my stomach as I placed mine over his, and fell asleep.

_

* * *

__I ran through the woods screaming his name._

_ "Jacob!" I screamed running in circles. _

_I heard a howl come from the field just outside the woods._

_ Edward stood there, next to Jacob. _

_But this couldn't have been Edward…this vampire's face was twisted into something evil, something malicious and angry. _

_"I loved you…" He said to me, with his velvet soft voice that used to take my breath away. _

_"No Edward, I still love you." His lips were pulled over his teeth as he hissed. _

_"You love another…a wolf." He told me coldly. _

_My heart accelerated. _

_He had never reacted like this with me._

_ "Am I right?" He asked softly._

_ I nodded. I couldn't lie about it. _

_He knew I loved Jacob._

_ He kicked Jacob's already mangled body. _

_The wolf whimpered quietly. _

_He opened his eyes to look at me and it was the same look Jacob gave me when he was in his human form...the look he saved just for me. _

_"Goodbye, bells." I heard the words run through my mind, as Edward took a bite out of Jacobs' neck._

* * *

I woke up screaming at the top of my lungs, grabbing my legs and laying in the fetal position.

The tears had started long before I woke up.

"What is it? What's wrong?" Jacob was off the bed and on my side kneeling down on the floor so he was at my eye level.

"They hurt Jake…make them stop…" He ran a hand through my tousled hair.

"What hurts?" I opened my mouth to speak but no sound came out.

I let out a choking sob.

"These dreams I'm having about you…these terrible dreams where you're always the one who…dies…I lose you…and in this one it was Edward who…" I didn't want to think about it, I looked away from Jacob still crying.

He kissed my hair, my forehead, my nose, my cheeks, my chin.

"It was only a dream." He said, hoping to calm me.

"It was so real…" I told him, turning to look at him.

He wiped away my tears with his thumbs and kissed me.

I couldn't take it anymore- the agony of not having Jacob.

I took in the kiss, hoping to breathe him in while I could.

I moved my lips against his roughly, as he mistook my command for a request.

He had never been the one to deny me.

I grabbed him by his arms pulling him onto the bed so he was laying over me not putting any of his weight on me.

He moved his lips to my neck nibbling on it occasionally.

I closed my eyes taking in the moment.

At that moment I realized, I'd never want someone quite this much.

My heart twisted in my chest as realization hit me.

_Not even Edward._ I thought.

I couldn't take it anymore my hands gripped his shirt trying to remove it.

The second it was off my hands were caressing Jacobs' gorgeous body.

I rest my hand on his chest as I felt his faint heartbeat.

He looked down at me with nothing but love in his eyes.

He gripped my waist, lifting my shirt, wanting to feel the skin of my stomach.

He smirked, kissing me once again.

I bit his lip lightly. He pushed himself away.

"We can't do this, Bells." He told me sadly.

"It just…" He sighed, closing his eyes hoping to find the right words.

I knew what was wrong….he didn't believe that I wanted him as much as I lead on.

But I did. I wanted every bit of him.

At that moment, I wanted him more than anything.

I nodded. A little disappointed "I understand Jake." I smiled lightly, reassuring him that i was okay with it.

"I'm sorry i got carried away." He muttered.

I shrugged. "Happens."

He crawled back to his side of the bed wrapping his arms around me once again.

"I love you." I told him.

I heard the smile in his voice.

"Love you more." He whispered.

"Now sleep, honey." He said doing his usual routine whenever he had his arms around me.

I feel asleep with the feel of Jacobs' warm fingers tracing words, stars, and circles on my skin. "_Forever."_ I felt him write right before I fell asleep.

**A/N: Meh...i dont know. this is a good chapter, needs a lot of work but oh well. When im not so tired, i'll check it out. I think the ending is adorable though. and if you guys didn't figure out what the key point in this chapter was it was the dream that she had, and then her pretty much telling Jacob that she's been having nightmares about him. Review pleasseee no flames. Thank yoooou.**


	4. Visitor

**A/N: I've been getting so many Emails saying "story alert" and this alert and that alert and some people added my story to there fav. story. But i'm getting NO reviews...i got a few...but i need more everyone, i know how much of a pain in the butt i is to review but i want to know how many ppl actually enjoy this story and if i should give up entirely or keep going. So please please please review, thats all i ask.**

_Disclaimer: Twilight Series is not mine._

I woke up screaming the next morning.

"Another dream…" I muttered to myself.

I looked around the room and Jacob was no where to be seen.

Then, I heard the footsteps.

He heard me scream. "What happened?! Bells? What's wrong?" He asked rushing over to the side of my bed.

He framed my face with his hands.

"Nothing it was just another dream." He exhaled slowly, smiling, trying to hide the worry on his face.

I tried to do one of my famous reassuring smiles, but the dream had me scatter-brained.

"No really, I'm fine." I lied smiling the best fake smile that I could manage.

"Jacob!" Billy called, fear in his voice. Jacob walked to the bedroom door opening it.

"Yeah?" He asked peeking down the staircase at his dad.

Billy's hands were shaking uncontrollably.

Then it hit him.

Jacob sniffed the air, once, twice.

"Damn." He muttered under his breath.

I looked at him from the bed, complete confusion carved into my features.

What was going on? Then I felt it.

My heart leapt as I jumped up to look out the window.

Jacob practically flew down the stairs and was out the door in a matter of seconds.

"What are you doing here Blo- Edward." He spat.

Edward put his hands up in surrender.

"I haven't come here to cause problems; I just need to see Bella." Jacobs eyes were fierce; wild.

He snarled under his breath. "No." He hissed.

Edward smirked. "Don't test me mongrel. I don't think I'll go that easy on you this time. Using your thoughts to hurt me no longer works, they only make me angry. Now let me see my fiancée"

The word knocked the air right out of Jacob

_ "Fiancée" _He thought.

Edwards smirk widened as he finally found Jacobs weak point.

"Yes, fiancée." He repeated.

Jacob felt the same blow to his chest as before, only this time the word seemed a thousand times clearer.

She wasn't his. _"I want her forever…I love her…I…"_

Edward tried to hide the mask of sympathy under his scowling smirk.

"You can love someone with everything you've got, but that doesn't mean they'll love you back Jake." He explained.

Jacob glared at Edward, trying his hardest to hide the visible pain that seemed permanently etched into his eyes.

"Yeah, thanks Shakesspeare." He muttered sarcastically.

Jake stood his ground, clenching his teeth. "She does love me…You wouldn't know anything about it…you can't read her thoughts."

Edward nodded his head in agreement. "Touché, you've got me there. I can't. She may love you Jacob, but that doesn't mean you're the only man who has a piece of her heart. She.Is.Mine."

The tremors rolled down Jake's body.

The pain had subsided, now all he felt was anger, and raw hatred toward Edward Cullen.

"You tell me that over and over like I don't know…" Jake said, the tremors moving faster.

I stared out the window in horror as I watched the horrible scene.

My two loves, on the verge of ripping each others throats out. Probably all because of me, I always seemed to be the cause.

I watched as Edward stood completely still, not breathing.

Jacob's fists clenched into tight balls, his nails digging into the skin of his palms so hard I saw the blood dripping from his hands.

I ran downstairs pushing open the front door.

"Stop it!" I screamed standing in between them.

Edwards face completely softened. "Bella." He smiled.

Jacob gritted his teeth.

"Edward, what are you doing here?" I asked fear and shock mixing together.

"I missed you." He admitted, shrugging his shoulders.

"Oh!" I squealed running up to him and wrapping my arms tightly around his neck.

Jacob glared at us from the porch. I pecked Edward on the lips, three times, four, five.

Jacob's stomach had turned to mush.

He looked at the couple.

The girl he loved more than anything else in the world, and the vampire he envied….the creature who had Jacobs entire world.

Jacob hesitated swallowing, afraid the nausea would begin.

He tore his eyes away from the scene.

Closing them tightly, he turned around and walked into the house.

_"I give up." _He whispered.

Edward chuckled lightly in response.

Jake didn't turn to glare; he had meant for Edward to here it.

_"Take her with. I don't want her here anymore."_

Jacob went up to his room plopping down on the bed.

He ignored the tears that came from his eyes.

Jacob was not one to cry, he felt cowardly.

But the pain he felt was excruciating. The pain he felt was…unbearable.

_"Damn, I think I'd rather be struck with a single silver bullet and killed then continue to feel this."_ Jacob sighed closing his eyes, ignoring the tears and letting them dry instead of taking the time to wipe them away.

He heard the commotion outside, Bella objecting to leaving La Push until she felt things were safe.

"Always trying to protect everyone…" Jacob muttered.

"You're only human Bells." He said to himself.

He heard the front door slam and the angry footsteps leading up to his room.

* * *

I pushed open the door.

"Jacob Black what is your deal?!" I screamed.

I gasped when I saw the look in Jacob's eyes, when I saw his tear-stained face. "Are you- "

"crying?" He asked, finishing my sentence for me.

He chuckled. "Not very manly huh? I'll bet Edward never cries." He spat.

He got up, his hands still clenched into bloody fists. "Jake…you're hands."

"I don't care!" He shouted, looking at me with so much anger, so much hurt.

"Whats wrong?" I asked.

Stupid question, I should have known.

"You should know Bella, what is this all? A game to you?! am I just someone you come to to reassure yourself that Edwards always gonna be the best? He's always gonna be better. I get it! Maybe you should realize it already so this pain can stop!" Jacob shook his head mechanically, he paced his room the tremors rolling down his body once again.

"Better than who?" I asked stupidly.

"Then me!!" He shouted, punching the wall.

"Jake…I…" At that moment, I could breathe…I couldn't think.

"Do you love me?" He muttered.

I looked up at him confusion shown in my eyes.

"Bella, Do you love me?" I nodded, "Of course I do Jacob. You're my best friend."

He put a hand up. "No…not in that way…do you love me….love me as in you want to make love to me….marry me…be with me…forever…."

I looked at him for a long moment, the pain glistening in his beautiful eyes and everything seemed clear when I looked at him.

I wanted more than I could have.

"You know I do Jacob." I whispered.

Jacob licked his lips.

"then why wont you leave him…for me…spend your life with me…be with me…love me the way you want to…" He told me.

I looked away from him.

I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out.

"It's complicated.." I mumbled.

Jacob looked at me waiting for an answer. "How complicated?" He asked.

"Edwards my life…" I began.

Jacob opened the bedroom door.

"That's all I needed to hear." He whispered, Storming out of the house.

I got up and ran to the window, I noticed the tracks of clothing and then I caught sight of the wolf entering the forest.

Why was I doing this? Hurting the two people I loved the most in this world?

I stared at the wolf before he was so small I couldn't make him out anymore.

I needed Jacob, like my lungs needed air.

I thought of Edward at that moment.

* * *

_"I'll be here forever Bella, and you'll always be my only love. Jacob won't be here forever…Jacob won't…love you forever, and even if you don't see it now. That will hurt more than anything you've ever endured." I cringed, thinking back to that long year when he left me. When I felt I couldn't survive, when Jacob Black sewed my ripped heart back together. "More than anything?" Edward smiled, nodding. "I love you, Forever and always Bella." He whispered. "But you…love him so much more than you let yourself believe." I stared at Edward. He was giving Jacob the benefit of the doubt, giving him a chance at a fair fight._

* * *

I stared out the window as I came back to reality.

"A fair fight." I muttered.

But how was it fair?

Even if Edward wouldn't admit it, he would be hurting on the inside, more than he'd let me believe.

And Jacob…I was the air Jacob breathed, the moon on his endless nights.

I was the one thing he couldn't help being selfish with.

And for some reason, that made me happy.

**A/N: So i think i did a pretty good job on this chapter, and i got more ideas from just writing it. Hope you liked it. the little guest appearance from out lovely Edward. Sorry Edward/Bella fans if this story seems to blah by the way shes treating Edward but like i said...give Jake some credit...its his turn...at least for a little bit hehe...we never KNOW what the ending has in store. Reviews please please please.**


	5. Imprint

**A/N: this chapter's probably the shortest one so far...sorry. && i did my best since i can't get anyone to beta my story. I tried to make it the least amount of confusing as possible. As you can see, Bella narrorates this story in parts but then I narrorate other parts...so it is a bit confusing...i dont know...i'll get better as this story progresses. I still can probably make a lot of major and minor changes in previews chapters but i liked them the way they are so far. Until other random ideas pop in my head. Hope you guys enjoy this chapter. Reviews plllleasee. No flames. I know you guys probably arent used to an author who doesn't shut up but i just wanted to say that I picture Steven Strait (from the covenant) playing Jake and Emily Browning (lemony snicketts a series of unfortunate events) playing Bella...and for Edward...I do find Henry Cavill up to those standards but im not sure...but Henry Cavill for now...thats just how i see them, you may see them in compeletely different ways, though i do believe half of you will agree on Steven Strait as Jacob i love me some jacob. okay so sorry! this is half the page AHH! sorry READ! lol**

_Disclaimer: I do not own the twilight series or its characters._

Jacob raced through the trees to angry and hurt to look back.

_"You better keep her safe Jacob Black."_ Edward's soft voice was heard in the back of Jacobs mind.

Jake gritted his teeth. "Don't threaten me." He said.

Jacobs speed decreased the farther he was from his home.

"Where are you going?" Leah's voice entered Jacob's thoughts.

"Leave me alone!" Jacob hissed.

"Let her go." She told Jacob, soft but firmly.

Jacob stopped in the middle of the forest. "I can't…" He said.

He threw his head back and howled at the moon.

* * *

I huffed lying on the bed.

"He's been gone for a long time." I said to myself.

"Maybe I should go visit Charlie to pass the time." I lifted myself up closing my eyes.

"What am I going to do?" I muttered.

I didn't have the slightest clue between what I wanted and what I needed.

I couldn't let either one go.

I needed Jacob just as much as I needed Edward…maybe even more?

I couldn't comprehend anything at that moment; I was too confused, too angry.

"I'm so selfish." I mumbled under my breath.

I grabbed my car keys and stormed out of the house.

I was angry at myself more than anything.

The part of my mind that held all forms of common sense, I ignored at this point.

"Maybe I should just end my stupid pathetic life, I'm so sick and tired of hurting people. Especially the ones I care about the most."

I gasped as I heard the low growl in the back of my mind. "Stop it! Stop talking like that! Someone always has to get hurt when it comes to situations like this! Don't be ridiculous! How would Jacob survive?...How would I survive?!"

I sighed, putting the key in the ignition and starting the car.

"You're right, I'm sorry. I'm so stupid for even thinking up something as ignorant as that." I said aloud.

If I was anyone else, I would have probably thought I was crazy but Edward kept an eye on me sometimes, I knew he heard me.

"Thank you" He whispered, his voice faded in my head.

Jacob banged on Sam's door. Sam opened the door, his lips formed in a tight line.

"We've found another." He said calmly.

Jacob walked into the house.

Walking through the kitchen, he noticed the unfamiliar pacing of his heart.

Jake stopped at the doorway, his breath caught in his throat.

A girl, maybe sixteen laid on the couch twitching in pain.

"Who is she?" Jacob whispered.

Jacob couldn't take his eyes off of the beautiful girl.

Sam's face went a ghostly white.

"I know that look." Sam said his voice shaky.

Sam walked up to Jacob placing a trembling hand on his shoulder.

Jacob felt Sam squeeze and wondered why Sam was comforting him.

"It looks like you've just found your imprint." Sam told him sympathy in his voice.

The world fell out from underneath Jacobs feet as his heart dropped to the pit of his stomach.

Jake stopped breathing, forcing his eyes to tear themselves away from the girl.

He ran a hand through his raven hair.

_"What about Bella?"_ Jacob thought.

He closed his eyes tightly and Bella's face was the only thing he saw.

"This can't be." He whispered turning to walk out, forcing himself to leave behind the girl.

It was just as hard as he heard it had been to leave the person wolves imprint on.

Sam shook his head, denial washing over him. "That's impossible…you can't just leave her just like that."

Jacob turned around to look at Sam. "It's just as hard as you guys told me, but I have to…I have to get back to Bells."

Sam shook his head again trying to figure out what was going on, trying to figure out why the imprint didn't affect Jake like it did the rest of the pack.

"Bella shouldn't matter anymore…you found the one you're destined to be with." Sam said, his brows crinkling in confusion.

"I know who im supposed to be with…Bella…" Jake said, confidently.

Sam watched as Jacob glanced at the girl once more.

"Her name?" He asked calmly.

"Is, or Isabelle." Sam said.

Jacob chuckled. "Ironic huh?" He said walking out of the house.

He turned around taking one final look at the house. "No…she can't be….my imprint."

Sam ran out of the house.

"Stop Jake!" He shouted.

Jacob stopped quickly, turning around to meet Sam's face.

"Is knows, and she wants to be with you too." Sam said.

Jacobs face remained empty. "You know who I want to be with." He said softly and started walking once again.

"This can't be happening." Jake said through clenched teeth

_"I'm happy for you, Jacob."_ Edwards all too perfect voice entered Jakes head.

_"Shut up. Just because I found my…just because….none of this changes things with Bella."_ Jake hissed.

Jacob heard Edwards chuckle_. "That's up to her, wolf."_

Jacob gasped. It was true.

If Bella didn't want to stay with him anymore because fate took an unfortunate turn then that was entirely up to her.

Jacob growled under his breath, transforming into a wolf and running back to his house.

**A/N: soo yeah, not to terrible right? reviewwww pleasseee! chapter 6 will be up shorrttllly!**


	6. Unfamiliar

**A/N: Sorry it took so long to update. I'm a bit heartbroken right now...and depressed...but eh...I'll live. I hope you guys like this chapter. It's probably one of my favs. so far. Enjoy and review.**

I pulled up next to my Dad's cruiser, no matter how upset I was the fact that I was going to see Charlie made me feel a little better.

I knocked on the door awkwardly, I never knocked before but it felt required since I moved out.

My dad opened the door, his face went from dull and depressed to happy, he was grinning from ear to ear.

"Bells!" He pulled me into a tight bear hug.

"What are you doing home?" He asked, letting me go.

"I'm staying with the Blacks for a while." I shrugged, "Guess I missed Jacob more than I thought I would."

Charlie crinkled his brow. "Where's Edward?" He asked in the nicest way possible.

"He's still at school. I came alone." That definitely put a smile on Charlie's face;

He was on team Jake ever since Edward broke my heart and Jacob was there to pick up all the little pieces.

"Are you and Jake?.." He began.

I smiled at him uncomfortably. "It's complicated." I said.

He raised an eyebrow. "And Edward?" He asked.

I sighed, "Also complicated." Charlie saw that I was not up to talking about Edward and Jacob.

"So dad, how's your dinner been without me?" I teased.

He shook his head, "Not so great." I looked down and in his right hand was a tackle box.

"Were you on your way out?" I asked nodding toward the tackle box since it seemed like he had forgotten all about it.

Charlie looked down at the tackle box.

"Oh…um yeah, I was about to go fishing actually." I looked at him in surprised.

He never went fishing this late in the evening.

Maybe he changed his fishing schedule while I was away at college.

"Well, it's fine I could always just come back tomorrow or something." Charlie nodded, even though his eyes told me he didn't want me to leave.

"I'll be here for a while; I'm taking a couple semesters off." Wonder lingered over Charlie's features, but he knew I probably didn't want to talk about that either.

"Alright Dad, I'll be back. I love you and have fun." I gave him a tight hug before pulling out my keys and walking to my car.

I pulled up in front of Jacob's house and saw him sitting on the porch, his hands clenched into fists.

I was so used to that reaction; I never wondered what was wrong anymore.

I sighed, walking up to the porch.

"Look, I'm sorry okay Jake? I'm just so confused. I'm sorry." I rambled on and on like I usually did whenever I was nervous.

Jacob was shaking horribly.

I gasped watching the blood drip from his hands to the floor of the wooden porch.

Crumpled up in his right hand, was a note. "What' in your hand?" I asked in mono tone.

"It was taped to the door when I came home from Sam's." His tone was flat.

I slowly reached to grab it out of his hands.

The sight of the blood made my stomach churn.

I opened the note trying to remember how to breathe. "Not again." I whispered.

The note had no more than three words written on it, three words I was terrified of.

"**She is mine."** It said in big bold letters.

Jacob gritted his teeth. "If this is your Bloodsuckers idea of a joke, I don't find it very funny."

My head was spinning now and I felt like I was going to faint.

"This isn't Edward's handwriting, and he wouldn't do something like this." My voice sounded muffled and distant.

My hands trembled and I suddenly felt colder than usual.

Jacob reached out for me grabbing my waist.

He pulled me onto his lap. I felt safe, protected when Jacob held me in his arms.

As if no harm could come to me.

I laid my head against his solid chest, listening to his heartbeat.

The heartbeat I knew all to well, the heart beat I knew well enough to notice it had changed.

He kissed my hair and rested his lips against my cheek.

"As long as my heart still beats, as long as I'm still breathing, I won't let anything hurt you. Do you trust me enough to believe that?" He asked.

I nodded, " Yes." I said softly.

My heart ached in my chest for an unknown reason.

Jacob was different. There was an edge to the way he spoke to me.

The feel of his lips against my skin was unfamiliar.

His heartbeat…had changed; it had struck a different rhythm.

All of this frightened me the longer I thought about it.

I wrapped my arms around him, holding on to him with everything I had.

At that moment I would give up everything just to hear the love for me in his voice, to listen to the heartbeat that I knew.

I hid my face, closing my eyes so I wouldn't cry.

"Bella, what's wrong?" He asked.

He felt my trembling hands grip his neck.

I lifted my head to look into his eyes.

My heart sank as my blood ran dry.

The love that Jacob had for me, the love I saw in his eyes each time I looked at him…was slowly fading.

I shook my head. "I feel it Jacob, the unfamiliarity…why?"

He sighed closing his eyes, "I was…Sam had me go to his house, he said it was important. They found another Quileute wolf. Her name is Is." He said, looking away from me.

He exhaled, trying to build up the courage to look into my eyes.

Hurt was all I saw. "She's also my imprint."

My heart shattered in my chest as those words repeated in my head.

I clutched my chest, hoping the pain would stop.

I couldn't lose Jacob I would give up anything to make this nightmare go away…even Edward Cullen.

I gripped Jacob tighter, digging my nails into the back of his neck.

Tears filled my eyes. I didn't hesitate, I kissed him deeply, roughly hoping it would restore some of the love he felt for me.

His hands rested at the small of my back.

He broke the kiss, resting his forehead against mine.

"Jacob I can't lose you." I whispered.

"You don't love me anymore." I choked out, the tears finally falling.

He framed my face kissing me again, gently.

"You know I love you. I'll always love you." He whispered against my lips.

The pain I felt in my heart at that point was excruciating.

His words mended my heart, but reality shattered it just as quickly.

He found his destiny, and I was not a part of his future.

"My heart beats for you, Bella." He said softly.

Everything he told me was hard to believe, I knew the story of Sam and Leah…how were we any different then them?

When a wolf found his imprint….that was it.

Sam did love Leah once before, but then he found Emily and nothing mattered anymore.

I was going to end up like Leah, Heartbroken and worthless.

I wouldn't matter anymore.

I wouldn't mean anything to Jacob Black.

He had become my protector, my life-line; He was the only person who made me want to continue to feel my heart-beat, to breathe.

He was the only reason I remained human.

Jacob looked at me, pain was the only thing I saw when I looked into his eyes and each time my heart beat I felt like I was being ripped in half.

"Please, believe me Bella." He begged.

I pulled my body as close as I could to him.

I needed to feel him.

"But Sam and Leah..." I began.

Jacob growled under his breath, the angry growl made my thoughts disappear.

He clenched his jaw tightly.

"I will not do what he did. We were made for each other Bella. I'll love you always."

Jealously hit me then, all at once.

"But she'll have a piece of your heart." I mumbled.

Jacob sighed, "Edward almost has your entire heart. He also has you. I have to live with that truth every single day." He whispered.

I looked at him, my vision blurred by tears.

"You have me, too." I said softly.

He chuckled, "That's true, but I don't want to share, and neither do you." I looked away from him processing the last part of that sentence.

What he said was true, I didn't want to share.

I wanted Jacob all to myself, but I had to share, I had no choice.

I bit my lip. "Promise me, she won't have your heart…I'll do anything."

Jacob hugged me tightly. "Don't turn." He whispered.

I nodded, but didn't respond to that command.

He kissed my neck. "It's impossible for me to love someone the way I love you." He told me.

I buried my face in his chest never wanting that moment to end.

**A/N: So, pretty good huh? Revvieeww please, and no flames.**


	7. Jealousy

**A/N: YES!!! FINALLY! Chapter 7 is up!!! yayyyy!!! I'm sorry it took me so long, i've been busy and i lost my rough copy and blah...it was a mess.**

**_Disclaimer: I do not own the twilight series or any of the characters._**

"You tired?" Jacob asked me, whispering in my ear.

"Mhmm" I mumbled, my face was still buried in his chest.

We hadn't moved the entire time. I was afraid that if I loosened my grip on him, he'd disappear.

He pulled my closer to his body and stood up.

I wrapped my legs around his hips tightly. "I'm gonna lay you down." He whispered walking up to his room.

He set me down gently on the bed. I watched him open up the door, about to walk out.

"Where are you going?" I asked, folding my arms across my chest.

"The pack needs me." He explained.

"Is she going to be there?" I asked, swallowing.

"Someone sounds a little jealous." Jacob smirked.

I shrugged. "How can I not be?"

Jacob's smirk didn't fade. He walked back over to me and kissed my forehead.

"You have nothing to be jealous about Bella. I promise." He reassured me.

I wanted to believe him, but it seemed impossible, especially with all the things I've heard about imprints and werewolves and what not.

I nodded in agreement to his promise.

But I knew that the more time he spent with her the more he'd care for her…that's how things like this worked out.

He lifted my chin. "I love you." He said softly.

"You too…" I whispered. And before I knew it he was gone.

I crossed my arms, pouting.

I usually wasn't the jealous type but this was Jacobs imprint.

The one he was destined to be with.

As hard as I tried to keep him by me, the pack needed him, plus he was five times bigger than me.

I gazed out the window watching him run into the forest.

As angry as I was, I was happy I wasn't crying.

The sound of the doorbell startled me.

I was so into my thoughts I didn't even know the car that had pulled up into the driveway.

I flew down the stairs, the doorbell rang once more.

"I'm coming!" I yelled.

I swung the door open.

"Hello Miss." A man stood in front of me.

He was twice as tall and twice as big as Jacob.

"Old friend of the Blacks, they home?" I smelt cheap cigarettes on his breath.

"No, I'm sorry. They're not." I said politely.

He smiled curtly. "You must be Bella." He said. Bad vibe.

"Um, how do you know-"I was at a loss of words when I noticed his eyes flicker a deep menacing red.

I backed away as he pulled out a knife.

"Jacob will come right to me if I have you. Pretty girl like you, so much to offer." He grabbed me from behind, putting the knife up to my throat.

I struggled to pull free. "Now, now love." He breathed.

"Let me go." I grunted.

I pulled my leg up and heard his shriek.

All the clarification I needed to know I didn't miss my target.

His grip loosened and I pulled myself free jumping off of the porch and ran through the forest as fast as I possibly could.

I didn't stop to look but I knew something was chasing me.

My lungs burned and my sides ached.

I heard the snarl as the wolf pounced and gripped my side with his fangs.

The pain was intolerable. I closed my eyes, my body collapsing.

I fell to the ground, the pressure on my ribs wasn't any type of pain I'd ever felt before.

I heard the malicious crack of my own bones.

My vision blurred and I felt myself become very tired.

The pressure returned and I heard a blood curdling scream, whether it was from me or something else, I didn't know.

The breaking of my bones echoed in my ears as he broke the reminder of my delicate ribs.

"Jake!" I screamed, losing my voice. I gave up. I was dieing, I had to be. I closed my eyes and fell into darkness.

**A/N: Gets better, promise. Review pleasseee. No flames.**


	8. Afterlife

**A/N: AHHHHHHHHHH!!! i'm SORRY I just had to scream! it's been about a YEAR since i've updated this story but the ending totally came to me today! NO it's not done. This chapter might be a little rusty since i've had writers block on this story for sometime. I gotta get back in the flow of things. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review. No flames. Enjoooy.**

**_Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight Series_**

The scream ran through his mind almost instantly.

He turned around, ready to run out of Sam's house. Sam stood in front of the door, resting his hand on Jacobs shoulder.

"You have responsibilities, you're not leaving." Jacob growled under his breath, slapping Sam's hand away.

"Don't tell me to stay here. She needs me." Sam gritted his teeth, the veins in his neck popping out.

"And you're going to run to her? She's just jealous." Jacob raked his hair back with his hand, ignoring the tremors that ran through his body.

"She could be in danger." He said.

Sam exhaled, irritated.

"You're just gonna leave Is?" Sam asked.

Jake frowned. "I-" He began.

"Let him go." Is told Sam.

Jacob looked back at her and nodded a thank you.

He lept off of the porch and ran into the forest, following Bella's scent.

She was dying, alone.

No Edward, No Jacob, just a painfully lonely death.

But that's the way life always ended right?

You die alone…

Bella's vision came in and out of focus. He really wasn't coming this time…

She closed her eyes, accepting her fate,

the last thing her mind processed was an image of a beautiful wolf running toward her mutilated body.

Jacob whimpered as he nudged Bella's arm with his snout.

He howled as tragedy and pain filling his lungs.

He transformed into his human form and ignored the steady tears coming from his eyes.

He checked Bella's pulse. It was faint.

Jacob closed his eyes,

Calling out to the last person he wanted help from.

_Edward._

_Edward. _

Jacob tucked a strand of hair behind Bella's ear.

_What's happened? _It was Edward.

Jacob sighed.

Edward felt that Bella was in danger.

Jacob had felt it too, but for some reason he knew it would never mean as much coming from his as it did coming from Edward.

He could never measure up.

_Come, now. It's Bella…_

* * *

Death was cold an unwelcoming as Bella stood in a black abyss.

"This...this can't be the end..." She whispered to herself.

She was alone. Is this how it really was in the afterlife?

More suffering while dead than when you were alive?

_Don't leave me…Bells..please..._ Jacob's voice came from all around.

And then an image appeared of Jacob…holding Bella's limp body in his arms.

_"I love you...I love you..." _He whimpered.

Bella's heart ached for him _don't cry…Jacob…please… _tears ran down Bella's cheeks as she looked up at her dead body.

What a horrible way to die...

The image of Jacob holding her body disappeared and was replaced by him and Isabelle.

The aftermath of her death…

He was so happy with Isabelle on his arm, as they walked down the isle and he slipped that diamond wedding ring on her finger.

Bella couldn't help but feel a little sting of envy.

The image changed once again, and this time it only showed Is...

She was walking through the forest, the same forest Bella had been murdered in.

How odd.

She kept on looking back as if she was afraid she would be followed.

Bella gasped in shock.

The person Is met up with was Bella's murderer.

"Thank you, for getting rid of that stupid human girl." She said, evil penatrating her eyes.

"Here's you're reward." She said as she handed him a bag.

_So it was Isabelle…_

The images faded and before her stood a man with translucent golden skin.

"Hello, sweet Isabella Swan." The man looked up at her, his eyes almost a blood red.

"I am Xavier, angel of salvation." He smiled at her.

"I am your Savior."

**A/N: Revviewss!**


	9. A Lover's Sacrifice

**A/N: SOOOO!!!!! New Chapter is up! and i think this one is actually very good!!! and it's LONG! I've noticed that I only got about 2 reviews on the last chapter...i know i fell out of this for a while so im sure most of you stopped checking, but im back and i really want to know how much people enjoy this story. I love feedback and reviews...so please. If you'd be so kind. Enjoy!**

_Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight Series_

Edward entered Sam's house with Bella in his arms.

Jacob looked over Edwards shoulder at his Bella…God, he didn't know what he would do if he lost her…

_You were supposed to be protecting her..._

Edward was inside of Jakes head.

Jacob looked up at Edward

"I know." He spoke. "I know…"

Edward laid Bella down on the long couch. Her color was already disfigured…she had lost a lot of blood.

Edward ran a trembling hand down his face.

"Can you save her?" Jacob asked as he ran his thumb across Bella's cold cheek.

"Yes, but...we only have one option." Edward said as he looked up at Jacob, the apology shown in his eyes and Jacob knew at that moment what Edward meant.

"No…no…I need more time with her, you can't turn her-not yet." Jacob began.

Edward stood up and grabbed Jacob by the collar of his shirt, slamming him up against the wall.

"If I do not…she will die. I don't know about you, but losing her would be unbearable for me…" Edward said through gritted teeth.

Jacob slapped Edward's hands away as angry tears came from his eyes.

"You change her and then what? Where do I end up? I lose her either way!!!" He shouted, clenching his fists.

"Stop being so selfish wolf. Wouldn't you rather see her alive?" asked Edward.

Jacob gritted his teeth. "How would she be alive? Her skin would always be as cold as it is now, she wouldn't need to breathe, or eat, or even go out in the sunlight…She would still be dead to the world."

Edward glared at Jacob. "We don't have time for this Jacob."

"Isn't there another way? I'll do anything…" He pleaded.

Edward sighed. He was hoping it wouldn't come to this, but Jacob was stubborn.

Edward didn't blame him for wanting at least a little more time with her.

No matter how much it bothered Edward, Jacob was honestly in love with Bella, and as much as it pained him, he couldn't pretend like he didn't know that Bella was in love with Jacob.

It was a confusing love, but she loved him nonetheless.

"We have one other option." Edward announced.

He looked around the room and noticed the entire pack standing around them.

His instinct kicked in as he noticed the girl in the back, the unfamiliar one.

She had an evil aura.

"What's the other option?" Jacob asked impatiently.

Edward put his hand on Jacobs shoulder and was rather surprised when Jacob didn't nudge it off.

"How far are you willing to go to save her?" Edward spoke softly; pain was glistening in his eyes.

He knew he could no longer interfere in the relationship that existed between Bella and Jacob.

He had forever, and he would wait forever for his beloved, as long as she was happy.

"I'd do anything…" Jacob whispered.

"Would you give your life for the one you love?" Edward asked softly.

There was a moment of silence and then Jacob spoke. "Of course…"

As he spoke those words, his head instantly turned in the direction of Is.

She had tears pouring from her eyes and she turned around and left.

Jacob's heart ripped in half, it felt as if she took a piece with her when she walked out of that door, a part of his mind was shouting for him to go after her.

He looked down at his beloved Bella who was no longer breathing…Isabelle escaped from his thoughts as he became sure of his decision.

"What do I have to do?" He asked, looking at Edward.

* * *

Edward called Carlisle; he needed him there for this just in case there was a chance at saving Jacob.

Edward still hadn't told Jacob what it was that he was doing, but Jacob wasn't dumb.

He knew it was going to be painful and feel endless and it would probably take his life, but Edward peered into his mind and saw that he would go with no other option.

He would easily give his live for Bella.

He wasn't wondering about the pain, he wasn't even hoping he wouldn't die.

The only thing that flooded his thoughts was keeping Bella alive.

Edward stared at him; he didn't understand how someone so arrogant and selfish could be so…caring and unselfish when it came to one person.

A person Jacob thought didn't love him.

Edward tried to ignore the sympathy in his heart for Jacob.

He loved Bella, too. But he would admit one thing and only one thing to Jacob before he died.

Edward knew in his heart he didn't love Bella more than Jacob...

As much as he did love her, it was impossible for him to love Bella as much as Jacob did, and that was hard to not only take in, but believe as well.

"We don't have much time Jacob." Edward said.

Jacob stared at Bella, not capable of feeling.

"Then what are we waiting for? What do I need to do?" He said as his empty eyes turned toward Edward.

"We must drain the blood from the main artery in your heart." Jacob's expression didn't change, nor did his thoughts.

"Why?" He asked simply. "What will it do?"

Edward grabbed the golden knife from his back pocket.

"It will heal her entirely. You see, Werewolf blood is tremendously stronger than Vampire blood. She's so far off right now that the only option I have is to turn her…I could have saved her if I had just gotten here in time…" Edward said.

Jacob rested a comforting hand on his rivals shoulder.

"Don't. It was my fault, and right now I just want her alive."

Edward closed his eyes not wanting to tell Jacob the rest. "Jacob…you might not live."

Jacob nodded. "I know."

This came as no surprise to Jacob; he was ready to endure anything.

There was no limit when it came to Bella's life.

He would do anything.

* * *

Bella watched the scene play out in front of her from the afterlife.

"Will he die?" She asked in no more than a whisper to Xavier who stood beside her.

"I do not know child. But it's a very strong possibility." Bella bruised away the tears with her knuckles.

"I can't watch him die!" She screamed.

"Why am I still living? Why don't you just let me die?" She asked Xavier.

"I am your savior, your guardian angel. I could never." He told her.

"Don't let Jacob do this…please…" She begged and begged.

Xavier looked over at Bella as she pleaded, she fell to the ground slumped over.

It was painful to see his human in such turmoil.

"Bella, this is his choice. He loves you enough to do this for you." He began.

Xavier lifted Bella to her feet and he held her hand in his.

"Most people spend a lifetime searching for a love that conquers _anything_. Jacob has given you that my dear. Don't get me wrong, Edward Cullen does love you with his entire being…but sometimes that is not enough, especially when you are undead."

Bella looked into Xavier's eyes as she took in his words.

It was all coming together and making sense. She finally understood.

"You see my child; Jacob has something to give up for you, his life. Most people take that for granted because a life is only so great. But if you look at it in a dead mans perspective it's a beautiful thing. If you look at life for what it truly is then it's wonderful. Jacob is giving that up for you. He is giving you the air he breathes, and the heart that he loves you with. He will never be able to feel the ocean on his skin or a beloved in his arms. He will never be able to walk in the sunlight or smell the air. That part of his life will be over."

Bella's heart couldn't take all of what Xavier was telling her.

He wasn't making her feel good about what Jacob was doing; in fact she was wishing she would die.

Xavier laughed a cold hollow laugh. "Your thought's just proved to me what love can do to someone. He's being unselfish with you while you want the same. You want him alive as much as he wants you alive, but things can't always work like that."

Bella tried to fight the tears.

"Don't take him from me." She whispered.

"I am sorry…" He told her as he faded.

She watched as Edward stabbed Jacob in the heart, he thrust the knife downward to open up his chest.

Jacob screamed in agony as the pain finally caught up to him.

Edward finished only minutes later.

He hacked and sliced away the flesh with sorrow in his eyes.

Then, there it was Jacob's heart; Unprotected and beating slowly.

The veins pumped at each beat and then Edward spotted the main artery.

Bella watched from the afterlife, distraught.

She had to do something.

She could not continue to watch someone she loved give up his life.

This couldn't be the end.

**A/N: Reviews please!**


	10. IMPORTANT! READ!

A/N:

Sooo EVERYONE who loves this story I'm soooooooooo sorry!! It's seriously been about what? 2 years or so since I've actually UPDATED??? Oh my goodness..i need to finish this story, I really don't want to leave it unfinished…to be honest I just ended up falling out of it once I finished all the books and found out how it really turned out. WELL since I'm team Jacob all the way (or team Taylor Lautner ;) I must finish this story. After seeing New Moon last night I became compelled. My poor sweety I hate when she ends up breaking his heart. So I must finish. I will begin tonight possibly. Expect something soon, if not write me and yell at me. Lol Thank you! And I hope I still have some readers left who would love me to finish this! It will make me want to finish it knowing people actually like what I've written. Please give me feedback. Thank you!


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